Ben's Story
Ben will always be our youngest son, a happy, healthy, fun loving boy and best friends with his elder brother, Luke. However it was a month after his 9th birthday party that our whole world began to crumble, Ben suffered a little seizure which became one of many over the next few days.
We took Ben straight to hospital. Before we knew it, Ben was going through a myriad of examinations, tests, scans and under went a biopsy. A few days after the biopsy we were given the results. My wife, Su and I got the news, that as parents we had hoped so hard not to have to hear. Ben had a malignant brain tumour, in other words, cancer. Words can’t adequately describe how we felt at that point, distraught, devastated, shocked, angry; all of these and more. But most of all we felt that we’d stepped into another world in the space of a few seconds, one where we had no experience, no compass to guide us and nobody to turn to. Almost immediately, Ben began a course of Radio and Chemotherapy along with a cocktail of drugs to control his seizures. In the midst of this, Sally and Ally came into our lives.
Sally and Ally are CLIC Sargent Nurses, and they provided so much more than just medical advice. They guided us through how we told Ben’s older brother Luke about what was happening, explained to us about the effects of Radio and Chemotherapy, helped us to navigate the never ending NHS maze and supported us
through some of the darkest hours anyone can imagine. But most importantly of all they were there for Ben. It was thanks to Sally and Ally that Ben was able to have blood tests and much of his treatment at home rather than in hospital. It was also thanks to Sally and Ally that Ben understood and wasn’t scared of any of the treatment that he was given, they were always honest, but they always cared about and intuitively knew how precious and desperately ill our little boy was.
Ben bravely fought the tumour that was continuing to grow in his brain. But in December 2011, 8 months after his initial diagnosis, the doctors sensitively told us that there was no more that could be done, the Chemotherapy had to be stopped. It was at this point that Sally and Ally stepped up even further. With their help, Ben remained at home until he passed away peacefully in our arms on 23rd February 2012, surrounded by those who loved him most. Sally and Ally visited us 3-4 times each day towards the end. Together, we'd made sure that Ben didn’t have to cope with any scary machines or have people around him that he didn’t know. And they cared deeply about Su, Luke and I, they were always quietly there for each of us when we needed them the most, intuitively understanding what we were going through and making sure that we were prepared for what we had to face. They are still there for us now, over 2 years since we lost Ben, just making sure that we are doing OK and helping us with each stage of what, at times feels like a never ending wave of grief.
Lots of children do recover from cancer but some, like Ben, don’t.
10 families each day in the UK are told that their child has cancer – that’s 10 more families like mine who will desperately need the help of CLIC Sargent.
Nige
Benny Boy Crutchley Fund
An Especially For You fund has been set up in Ben's name to support CLIC Sargent.
You'll see our team fundraising target on the right. Your donation can really help us smash this goal.
Take a look below at our donation pages or start up your own!
About CLIC Sargent Especially For You
All contributions to this Especially For You fund will go to support the work of CLIC Sargent.
Every day 10 families are told their child has cancer. CLIC Sargent is the only organisation to offer them all round care and support. CLIC Sargent is the UK’s leading cancer charity for children and young people, and their families. We provide clinical, practical and emotional support to help them cope with cancer and get the most out of life. For more information, please visit www.clicsargent.org.uk
Thank you very much for your support!
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So please dig deep and donate now.
