This summer, I am taking the plunge. Literally (you may groan at this point). Twice.

On 18 July, I am competing in the Great London Swim – a mile at the Royal Victoria Dock on the Thames, a river well known for being (a) freezing the whole year through (b) dangerous and (c) infested with all kinds of things which, to be understated, fall far short of charming. In the hope that I survive that battle with London’s weather, concrete and post-industrial water quality, on 29 August I will be heading to Loch Lomond, beyond all civilisation. Loch Lomond may be famed for its bonny banks – but rest assured that I won’t be stopping to admire the view. I’m entering the two mile Great Scottish Swim. It’s double the fun in every sense – a guaranteed hour (at least!) swimming for dear life, and for the honour of England, before the icy bitterness of the water fixes me rigidly in some corner of the loch.

I’m doing this for the Royal Star and Garter Homes, a wonderful, and very under-appreciated, charity. Royal Star and Garter run care homes for disabled and infirm former military personnel. You might think this much of a muchness: aren’t all those military charities the same? But for 99 years now Royal Star and Garter have led the way in redefining standards of care for ex-servicemen. The charity rightly believes that ‘there is no such thing as a hopeless case’ and, whether developing therapeutic caring, employment for the disabled, para-sport or, more recently, tailored approaches to dementia, it has always lived up to that maxim. As more ex-military personnel with severe injuries and disabilities live longer, the charity finds its unique approach to looking after those who’ve served our country in ever-greater demand. That’s where we can help.

So, if you like the idea of me suffering (even more than my television appearances!) in open water, and for a cause as good now as it was amid the horrors of the Great War a century ago, then please think about donating something, however small an amount. 

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