When I opened my pub The Drapers Arms in Islington in 2009 I was committed to it being a part of the community - including giving back to the community in all of its wider forms. Our first charity event was in support of Breast Cancer UK which my mother is a survivor from. 1 in 7 women can expect to get breast cancer at some point in their lives and I am sure we all know someone who has suffered from it - perhaps an aunt, a sister, parent, friend or work colleague. Did you know that 1 in 4 women will suffer from domestic abuse? How many people do you know who have? You do know someone even if you don't know who that someone is.

Sadly it remains under talked about, hidden - as if women victims should feel embarrassed or ashamed of their experience of violence at the hands of men. As a result not only does it not get the attention or resources it requires it also doesn't get the funding it needs.

In 2013 in a fit of unsupressable anger at the treatment of women I wrote this blog post announcing that from that day forward I would be donating all of the Draper's takings - every single £ spent in the building - on Valentines day to Refuge. It wasn't necessarily the most costed out of pledges but we have stuck to it to this day - meaning that personally i have given the charity considerably in excess of £60,000.

https://thedrapersarms.tumblr.com/post/39570900007/valentines-at-the-drapers-2013

Each year so many of the pub's community - locals, guests, staff, colleagues and peers - congratulate and support this donation to a cause so many people wish didn't exist, didn't need funding and whose existence brings us shame. So this year when my lovely son Louis said he wanted us to run a marathon I was delighted that Refuge were able to offer us marathon places - so that everyone who feels that way can join us in supporting this important cause. If you do have anything spare be it a simple £5 of a big chunk of cash every single contribution will make a difference.

When it comes to marathons I never feel it is the event on the day that is the action that deserves support but the huge commitment over the long lead up. At my age anything other than 100% fitness would mean a horrible experience so now, in June 2024, I am already doing around 50km a week. The thing that hurts me is the missed cosy snuggles on a day off morning that instead becomes the week's long run day, the nights when i really do want to stay up late and wake up feeling rubbish when I finally get home but head home for an early night. And yes it probably is the slapping sound of Louis' shoes as he trains hard to beat me!!

This was my pledge at the end of my blog. Please do join us in the fight to end violence against women. thank you Nick (and Louis) xxx

So, in the round, I’m not that comfortable ringing the tills in the name of mens’ love for women on the 14th of February and turning a blind eye the rest of the time to mens’ collective acts of violence against women. Women should step out into the world feeling genuinely loved by men 365 days of the year. This year and every year until it is no longer needed we will treat all of our takings on valentine’s as a voluntary donation from our customers to a charity organisation that supports women affected by the violence of men. This year that will be Refuge