2024

We are participating in the Stomp Out Suicide 5K again this year in memory of Kaleb Lofboom and to help raise awareness around mental health and the stigma that goes with it; we hope you can join us.

The Stomp Out Suicide Event and Canvas Health support all in spreading the message that depression, anxiety, PTSD, bi-polar, borderline personality disorder, suicide ideation and all mental health issues do not define us, we can write our own story; For those that have lost a loved one to suicide, they provide a safe place to share stories, pictures, and great memories of them.

Together we can help reduce the stigma around mental health and suicide.

Register for the Stomp Out Suicide 5K: Please register for this 5K using this link or copy and paste into your browser. When you register, please select the Team Name KALEB'S KREW https://www.canvashealth.org/event/stomp-out-suicide-5k/

T-Shirts: If you would like one of the t-shirts Kelci designed, please click this link or copy and paste into your browser. The deadline to order those is July 22. https://www.customink.com/g/rgg0-00cv-k62j

We hope you can join us after for a BBQ at our house after the 5K. Please email Jessie at jlzebras@hotmail.com and let us know you can make it.

Thank you for all of your love and support!

Kaleb’s Krew

Previous Year Messages

2023

We participate in the 5K in loving memory of Kaleb Lofboom 5.8.99 - 5.22.2018.

I cannot imagine the courage that it takes to tell someone that you don’t think you can continue to live. LIFE IS TOUGH, BUT SO ARE YOU! But… tough doesn’t mean that you have to go through life’s struggles alone!

We must realize that there is help – please take that really big first step and confide in someone. If the first person doesn’t provide you the help / direction you need, please don’t stop reaching out. One of Kaleb’s great friends, Megan Sahlberg, has shared many beautiful memories with us over the past 5 years about Kaleb helping her when she was first experiencing mental health problems. We want to share a few of her comments to show that we can truly help one another and share a few of her stories of how amazing Kaleb is. “…..I truly owe him everything. He quite literally saved my life. He was the one who talked me down so many nights and encouraged me to embrace everything I am. My parents have also been so thankful for his presence in my life. I would not have gotten into treatment and through that journey without him… Over the years I’ve thought so much about Kaleb’s impact on my life- memories and words that I’ve carried with me and cherish very deeply. He was a character that carried through a room with ease and a smile so contagious to everyone. Of the many memorable traits he possessed, Kaleb had a way of making those around him feel seen. During the days in my life I thought there wasn’t a soul that could understand, he saw me, heard me, and helped to guide me. In a world sometimes deep in chaos, loud with hustle and bustle, find the time for those around you. Be the friend that sees, hears, and does their best to understand. Be someone’s Kaleb!” When someone helps you while they’re struggling too, that’s not help, that’s love.

Small things often have great impact - we have to:

Make it ok to admit that we aren’t ok.

Be kind.

All stand up against bullying.

Throw judgement out the window.

Share what makes us happy with others hoping to spark joy.

Realize that we are never truly alone.

Realize that if we do not step forward, we will remain in the same place.

Understand that just because someone carries it well, doesn’t mean it isn’t heavy.

Understand that sometimes it only takes a simple question “how are you, how can I help, let’s find help” to be that push forward someone needs.

Even the toughest people sometimes need help, reach out to someone, anyone (dial 988).

2022

I read a post on LinkedIn just this morning by a mother whose son died by suicide. Her message was about how our words can hurt, that to say someone committed suicide criminalizes it and she wished it would be standard verbiage for people to say that one died by suicide. I often think that when I mention my son died by suicide it immediately defines him due to the stigma around suicide. I also think of the 4 years that Kaleb battled anxiety and depression and wish that people would define him by his courage to fight for 4 years just as we would someone who fought cancer or another disease and unfortunately lost that battle. Mental Health: depression, anxiety, bi-polar etc are diseases – but, because they are not seen or measured the same way, are thought of differently. Let’s acknowledge the battle people fought, thank them for fighting as long as they could, and remember them for their beautiful traits. Remember them as someone who was and continues to be thoroughly loved, a son, daughter, father, mother, aunt, uncle, or friend. Those of us that have lost a loved one for any reason can and do still have a beautiful relationship with their loved one. Extremely different, but still beautiful.

When I say my son died by suicide or lost a 4-year battle with mental health, people react very differently than if he died in a car accident. When someone dies in a car accident and their family members are at the store and see an old friend or acquaintance, they are given condolences. When your loved one died by suicide, people rarely acknowledge the loss. Here are my thoughts on steps that we can take to chip away at the stigma around suicide:

Acknowledge the loss.

Acknowledge their courage to stay as long as they could.

Don’t define the loved one by suicide; say tell me about your loved one.

Realize that small acts of kindness go a long way.

Include people, hold doors, smile, say good morning, say thank you, and acknowledge each other.

I am thankful to be part of Stomp Out Suicide for the positivity the 5K day brings, the awareness around mental health, and the judgement free zone. I participate with hopes that together we can help reduced the stigma around mental health and encourage anyone struggling to keep fighting, focus on the positive, and realize they are worth it!

2021

I cannot believe that it has been another year. Each year Kelci creates t-shirts for people to wear for the Stomp Out Suicide 5K and they all

have a special meaning / message. I want to start by sharing the messages behind those. Images of them can be found in the media section.

Year one shirts / message:

Kaleb loved fishing, hunting, eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch and drinking chocolate Yoohoo! His nieces couldn’t say his name just right, it sounded like Bubba so they called him Bubba, Yoohoo Bubba juice and Cinnamon Toast Crunch Bubba cereal! The shirts say Bubba on the back.

Year two shirts / message: The poem on the back says it all!

I've finished life's chores assigned to me, So put me on a boat headed out to sea. Please send along my fishing pole For I've been invited to the fishin' hole. Where every day is a day to fish, To fill your heart with every wish. Don't worry, or feel sad for me, I'm fishin' with the Master of the sea. We will miss each other for awhile, But you will come and bring your smile. That won't be long you will see, Till we're together you and me. To all of those that think of me, Be happy as I go out to sea. If others wonder why I'm missin', Just tell 'em I've gone fishin'

Year three shirts / message:

One of Kaleb’s greatest qualities was his empathy for others. If we all practiced having empathy for others more often, the world would be a much better place. If we could really listen to some of the messages that those struggling with mental health share, recognize the impact we have on others (good or bad) and be better because of them and their lessons; we could truly save lives. The poem on the back of the shirt says:

"My hands will reach out to touch another because of you.

My feet will carry me through each day because of you.

My heart will grieve with strangers because of you.

My eyes will see a world with new meaning because of you.

I’d gladly give anything to have you back with me

But, until that time, I will be kinder, love deeper, and live wild and free because of you. "

Year four shirts / message:

We all miss our loved ones when they are gone and hopefully, we can find a little comfort in the many amazing memories! The back of the shirt says:

Be the things you love most about the people who are gone.

While a little piece of our hearts went to heaven along with Kaleb, we smile through the tears and heartache thinking of the happiness, joy, and pride he brought us in his short time here. We miss him and pray he is holding us a spot: https://youtu.be/XNLPf8YhSc8

With Covid impacting all of our lives for well over a year, a lot of light has been shed on mental health; but that isn’t enough to breakdown the stigmas around death by suicide. The Stomp Out Suicide 5K helps in that each year it is held. Whether you can afford to donate or not, please come join everyone on 8.21.21 as we come together and celebrate the lives of those we love, lost, and honor their

memories, feel comfort by those with similar stories, or connect with someone who can offer a light at the end of your tunnel. For those joining, we will be having a BBQ back at our house after. I will be in touch via email closer to the 5K.

2020

As I write this, we are just entering our 3rd year without Kaleb here on earth, I am finding it hard to put our thoughts / feelings into words; so, I added our fundraiser / 5K messages from the first two years below. I have been trying to focus / re-direct my thoughts of grief and pain to a happy thought, memory, or a short prayer thanking God for loaning us Kaleb and to Kaleb for giving us time even when he struggled to stay. I hope that you can do the same; find gratitude when it is most difficult to see.

Sometimes it is hard to share the fact that Kaleb died by suicide. Not just because of the stigma around death by suicide, but, because I don’t want that to define Kaleb – he is so much more than that. He is

kind, protective, thoughtful, inventive, has the most beautiful blue eyes

and warm (and often mischievous) smile. He loves drawing, training

dogs, any type of sports, hunting and fishing, hiking, and music. He

was so fun to be around, always willing to lend a hand, and always up for adventure. When I talk about Kaleb to someone new, I immediately think man I wish you would have known him; you would have loved him, and I want to share amazing stories and pictures.

2019

We are walking again this year. I have to laugh when I say walking

because that is exactly what we did last year; it took us exactly

1:11:11 to cross the finish line! But boy was it amazing! Kaleb did this 5k about 5 years ago and ran about a quarter of it with someone on his back. Kind of fitting for the weight he felt on a daily basis. Everyone who knows us knows how proud of Kaleb we are; he did everything 100%. He lost his 4-year battle with mental

health 5.22.18. I have been asked a few tough questions this

past year and I want to share them with you; more importantly my responses / thoughts.

1. If Kaleb loved you.... how could he have done this to you?

I am very confident in Kaleb knowing how much we love him and how much pain he knew we would be in.... but, that leads me to understand the magnitude of pain he must have been in every moment.

2. That leads to a second tough question: How are you able to

function?

It’s not easy; but, I believe that Kaleb is in heaven looking down on us

and I want him to not feel guilt or shame..... I want him to be proud of

us - proud of our strength, love, endurance, and I want to set a good

example for our family and his beloved nieces and nephews, so we all join him in heaven.

I share these tough questions, answers, and feelings because to me they fit this 5k / charity to a T. It is about healing, families being together, and fighting the stigma around Mental Health and Suicide!

Whether you can afford to donate or not, please come join all of those walking, crawling, or running on 8.17.19......come together and celebrate the lives of those we love and honor their memories, feel comfort by those with similar stories, or connect with someone who can offer a light at the end of your tunnel.

2018

Come join us at the Stomp out Suicide 5K in loving memory of Kaleb Lofboom who passed away May 22, 2018. Kaleb did this run a couple years ago and it's a great way to not only honor his memory but also raise awareness for a great cause. One of the hardest parts of losing someone is learning to live without them, and that's one lesson we will never fully be able to grasp when it comes to Kaleb. We lost a son, a brother, an uncle, a best friend, and one of our biggest supporters. Everyone who knew him will never forget his eyes, his laugh, or his smile (all with a spark of mischief) Kaleb loved his family and friends so much and we can't thank everyone enough for being there for him. For 19 years we walked side by side with our best friend, our biggest fan, and our greatest protector; and he will continue to be all of those things, and more to us. The only thing we can do now is honor his life the best we know how. By always laughing, always chasing the next big catch, and raising hell whenever possible.