Thank you for taking the time to visit my just giving page.

I am taking part in the Glasgow Kiltwalk this year to raise money for the Canmore Trust. As many of you know, my husband Alan tragically took his own life almost two years ago, leaving me and his three children who were 6, 4 and 10 months at the time. Alan's suicide was completely out of the blue and a total shock to us all.

He had three children who adored him, lots of friends, a loving family, a successful career, and a huge passion for Glasgow Rangers. He had absolutely everything to live for and is missed by so many. I never thought this would happen to my family but it shows that suicide can affect anyone. I never thought my husband would become another statistic. It’s horrible to see your loved one as part of the total figures for suicide in Scotland because they were so much more than their death.

The Canmore Trust has supported me from the very beginning with John and Jayne visiting me. They, along with Isobel regularly keep in touch and offer me support as well as many others.

The Canmore trust raises awareness of suicide and helps families like mine who are left behind to pick up the pieces. Alan and I were both dentists, who along with other medical fields, have some of the highest suicide rates within their professions.

I didn't want to talk about Alan's death in the beginning. I felt that as a family our privacy was gone because his death was so public. The stigma surrounding suicide still exists. Suicide grief is complex, and unless you have experience of it directly, you just can’t imagine it. You feel every emotion possible, sometimes in the one day. For the last two years I have felt like I have mainly been in autopilot mode. There is no time to stop whilst raising three children and life is moving so quickly.

I have since found an amazing group called a place called here who have encouraged me to share my story and remember Alan. 'A place called here' is a suicide bereavement group newly set up in Glasgow. Speaking to others who have experienced the same devastating loss has been a huge comfort to me. We’ve all been brought together by our loved ones and something so special has been created. I am extremely proud that I will be walking as part of their team, and can't thank Natalie, Anton and everyone who attends the meetings enough for all of their support.

Training for the Kiltwalk will give me a brilliant focus this year. I am delighted to be able to give back to a charity that I appreciate so much. I am happy to raise much needed awareness about suicide too by sharing my story. One day I hope to help others directly affected by suicide through the Canmore Trust too. Being a solo mum, it's hard to find the time to do anything. With this in mind, I have bought a treadmill to help me train to walk the 23 miles! And my children are so exciting to watch me take part.

My children and I are doing our very best to navigate our new life without Alan. I have been unable to return to work following Alan’s death which has allowed me to be there completely for my children whilst they grieve. Henry, Matthew and Sofia miss their dad so much and Alan has missed out on seeing everything they have and will achieve. It’s not easy, but each day we keep moving forward. I count my blessings every day for my three beautiful children. We have made lots of happy memories together over the last two years in our new family unit and I am looking forward to making more with my little family.

Thank you again for your ongoing support,

Lisa x