Greetings! 

On August 15th, my friend Lucy and I are running the Dig Deep Ultramarathon in the Peak District. 30 miles, over 3000 feet of ascent, many tears and much suffering. 

I'd like to raise a little money for Mind, mental health support being an area that I think needs a lot more love and money, particularly in this age of austerity we seem to stuck with. 

So here's the deal - I'm selling poetry by the pound. Make a donation, and I'll write a poem about you. £3 buys you a haiku, £5 for a limerick, £14 for a sonnet (Shakespearean or Petrarchan, your choice), and so on. If you really want to test me, stick in £36 and I'll try and do a passable sestina...

Do not be deceived by the fact that I've got a couple of novels out - my skill as a poet pretty much starts and ends with comedic rhyming couplets. But I'll do my best, so pull some change out of your electronic pocket and donate if it strikes your fancy.