Our COVID nightmare - Stephen, Julie and Stuart Brown

These are entirely our own words. 

Note that there are parts of our story that are far too distressing to put down in black and white and shall remain private.

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All proceeds will go to Strathcarron Hospice which is a charity that’s
close to all our hearts, particularly as our mum worked there for over 20 years, up until she retired.

Look at the photos of our beautiful, happy Mum & Dad, Jim & Liz Brown 💕

Dad recently turned 74 and Mum is 73. They’ve been happily married for 53 years.

Throughout the lockdowns, Mum and Dad have rarely ventured out, instead spending the vast majority of their time, together, happy, in their own home.

Dad is diabetic and has had a stroke, so obviously in the high-risk category for COVID. He’s worked hard for his family all his days,
right up until retirement, is the life and soul of any party and never has a bad word to say about anyone.  Family is his number 1 priority.

Mum and Dad both tested positive for COVID on Friday 5th February, the day before they were booked in for their first vaccination. 

Before I go any further, to any of our Facebook friends that may be consistent rule breakers, conspiracy theorists, anti-vaxers (with no legitimate reason why you shouldn’t get the vaccine as and when available) or think ‘this COVID thing is all a big over-hyped hoax’, please READ THIS POST TO THE VERY END and if it doesn’t change your existing views or behaviour, kindly do us a favour and unfriend yourself immediately. You will not be missed!

On 3rd February, Mum developed a cough, nothing too bad but being the good citizens they are, they decided to book a test and were genuinely shocked when they both came back positive. Other than one brief trip to the supermarket a few days prior, they hadn’t been out.

Mum called on Monday 8th Feb to say that dad was acting out of character, i.e., delirious - however, he had NONE of the ‘classic’ COVID symptoms (fever, cough, loss of taste/smell). It was only when we researched the subject that we found out that COVID can attack the BRAIN, particularly in older people. Dad was admitted to hospital, given a full check-up and released that evening, however, on
returning home he was constantly drowsy and not communicating.   

The alarm bells were ringing and from this point, our lives were about to change forever.

We set up a group call and over the course of the next 6 days, with support from our fantastic Aunt Barbara (Dad’s little sister) and husbands/wives (Scott, Emma & Pauline) we dialled into countless calls to digest the info we had been given by Doctors/nurses/consultants and decide on the next course of action in relation to both my Dad and my Mum who was suffering from some of the classic symptoms (sore head, severe fatigue and loss of taste/smell). Bear in mind my mum is looking after dad on her own and as they both have COVID, none of us are allowed in the house, no matter how bad things are. Mum simply won’t allow us to put ourselves at risk.

Things really started to escalate from Friday 12th @ 7pm. Since returning from hospital on the 8th, Dad slept on and off most of the time and never actually talked, all this time being looked after by my seriously fatigued, ill Mum.  The COVID Emergency Team was called and arrived, carried out an assessment and concluded that Dad needed to go back into hospital ASAP.  The ambulance arrived at 8pm and left around 9.30pm, leaving my Mum alone, terrified about what may happen and absolutely shattered.  However, again, she was adamant she would cope and would not allow us to put ourselves at risk. 

We have to say that we have nothing but admiration for the professional, caring job the COVID teams and Ambulance crews do under the most horrific circumstances and extreme pressure.
We witnessed first-hand what heroes and heroines they are. We hold our Mum in the same high regard, having single-handedly cared for my Dad.

Over the next 24 hours, Dads condition steadily deteriorated, albeit there were a couple of occasions when we felt a glimmer of hope. He was initially admitted to a ward to be administered oxygen, steroids and insulin to stabilise his diabetes. He was then moved to ICU and put on a CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway Pressure). As he continued to deteriorate, we were then asked to make the most
difficult decision of our lives, keep him on CPAP and let him gradually slip away or move him onto a ventilator, in the knowledge that his chance of survival was very low and even if he did survive, his quality of life would be severely impacted (i.e. significant care requirements) Our initial collective decision was not to move him to a ventilator (based on discussions we’d all had with dad in the past), however, as we felt we could not involve our mum in the decision making process, we decided that we would not be able to live with ourselves if we’d said no, when mums wish would have been to say yes. We’ve all heard of the odd miracle case and hoped that maybe our dad could be the next one and we knew he would fight to the end. Transfer from CPAP to ventilator went well and for the first couple of hours he was stable, however, he then started to deteriorate quickly. We received a call to advise that he was nearing the end and would be moved to a private room to provide us with the option of saying goodbye in person.  We agonised over this decision, knowing that our mum would need our full support (if any of us went to hospital, we would need to self-isolate for 10/14 days) and that dad would categorically not want us to put ourselves at risk. We’re also not afraid to admit that the thought of going to the hospital and that it could potentially lead to one of us being in the same position in a couple of weeks
was terrifying. 10 mins after being told he was slipping away, the 3 of us made a group call to the hospital around 10pm and asked them to put the phone to Dads ear so we could say our final goodbyes.

The consultant that answered told us dad had just passed away. Devastating... he died without any of his loving family by his side.

We take comfort in knowing that had we decided to drive to the hospital, we would not have made it in time. We also take comfort in knowing that the heroic nurses and consultants at Forth Valley Hospital were with him until the end. Thank you FVH WARD A31
and ICU 🙏🏻❤️

... so, dad’s gone, and mum doesn’t know.  She’s in her house on her own, most likely asleep.  We take a brief break to grieve for our dad, break the news to our kids, all of whom are hysterical and then it’s onto yet another call to decide how we break the news to our mum and when.  We know that she’s suffering both mentally and physically and our main fear is that she will end up in hospital
too.  Taking into account that she could call the hospital at any time for an update on my dad (hospital staff briefed to tell her to call Stephen) we decide that we’ll break the news, take her from her home ASAP and move her to Julie’s house.... isolated in a room, on her own, until she is no longer deemed to be infectious.

If all of the above isn’t horrific enough and knowing that we will need to convince our mum to let us in, we meet at Stuart’s and get suited up in full PPE from head to toe, purchased earlier that day. Around midnight we arrive at my Mums front door and call her on the phone, but she doesn’t pick up, so we have no option but to go in and wake her. 

Can you honestly think of anything more horrific than being woken during a nightmare, faced by 4 masked individuals (see photo of us and Scott) being told that your husband of 53 years has died and then quickly moved to a car and driven away from your home? What did our 73-year-old mum do to deserve this?

.. so, it’s now Sunday and we’re all devastated, physically, emotionally and mentally shattered, praying that our mum first of all recovers from this horrific virus and has the strength to recover from this excruciatingly, traumatic, horrific nightmare.

So... to all you rule breakers, conspiracy theorists, anti-vaxers etc...  if you’ve managed read this far, DO YOU NOW GET IT???  THIS VIRUS IS REAL AND IT KILLS RAPIDLY!

Our story is one that has undoubtedly happened and will continue to happen to thousands of other families across the UK, claiming and wrecking lives and destroying families, traumatising the children and grandchildren of COVID victims forever.

We have all seen numerous posts along the lines of ‘they had underlying health conditions and would’ve died anyway’, ‘COVID gets blamed for all deaths to inflate the figures’ etc... Yes, my dad was 74 with underlying health conditions but he was living an active, happy life and would most likely have had many more happy years ahead if it weren’t for COVID.

Our mum and dad did nothing wrong and have paid the price for the selfish others that choose to flout the rules and basically don’t think or give a s*** about the consequences of their actions. 

Had we known then what we know now, we would never have allowed them to leave the house. We are sick to the back teeth of the complete and utter bulls*** that is shared by irresponsible idiots on social media, none of which they obviously bother to read fully, or fact check, prior to sharing to influence others, some of whom may believe what they read (usually something that’s been copied/shared from some random individual that they don’t even know) and drop their guard.

Why is it easier for some people to believe the bulls*** that these idiots spout and share as opposed to the information that every single news channel, newspaper, TV advert and government website is reporting? They really think there’s a conspiracy that every country, leader, government and hospital (apparently, they’re all half empty!?) has managed to keep under wraps for almost 1 year.  REALLY?

Why are we sharing our story?

In an effort to make a difference. Even if reading this convinces a few people to change their attitude and behaviour and in turn saves even just one life and prevents one family going through the living hell what we’ve been through, it’s a start and gives hope that our Dads death may just be the one that makes a difference.  Please share this story, particularly with your elderly relatives and friends.  Yes,
they may have been vaccinated but they’re still vulnerable and need to understand the risks.  Unless what they need to do is absolutely critical, it’s simply not worth it.

It’s time for the silent majority to stand up and ramp up the message that THIS IS REAL and drown out all the lies and bulls***!

Our Dad’s name is JIM BROWN, (Pappy Broon to his grandchildren and great-grandchildren) not COVID victim 117,396.

Love you Dad ❤️

Stephen, Julie & Stuart x