Myself and my son(hopefully some other family members) are doing this walk to raise money for both dementia research and support.

Last year my grand-mother and Josh's great grand-mother, Annie Mary Pringle Dunning died in Llwynypia in a hospital bed. She had been hospitalised for some 3 weeks. Her dementia was severe and eventually she stopped eating and was unable to speak or communicate.The staff at the hospital were wonderful and she was well looked after.It was a very sad and upsetting experience.Every time I saw her I hoped that she would pass away in the night as I did not want her to have to carry on suffering any longer. Mother Nature can be very cruel.

This was a long drawn out disease that took approximately 3 years to develop fully.My Nan had a fall,sustained a stroke and never really fully recovered.Although her speech and mobilty returned this was the beginning of the end for her.

Nanny (Annie to friends) was a feisty,bossy old (91) lady that gradually lost control of her life. I can only imagine that it must have been a very frightening and lonely journey. It started with memory loss,repeating stories and asking the same questions over and over.Dementia is a gradual process that seems to rob a person of their memories,personality and life skills. As Nanny's memory became worse we were concerned for her safety as she lived alone.She very reluctantly started having regular carers and a cleaner. My father visited daily. I visited on a weekly basis. I feel very guilty about this now but I found it very upsetting to see her in such a fragile and often anxious state.Initially she welcomed my gifts of cakes and sweets as at this point she still had an appetite.

Nanny was always very independent and spirited. Dementia meant that she had no memories of her long and happy marriage to my lovely grandfather John. She stopped sitting in her beautiful and well tended garden and I knew that she was ill when she stopped insisting that her carers fed her birds and squirrels every day. Her garden was her pride and joy. She was always outside weeding and pottering. She even weeded while on a zimmer frame. Nothing was going to stop her from looking after her garden and her birds.She fed them three times a day at regular intervals.i'm surprised that they could fly with all the rich tea biscuits that they consumed.

This lady loved cakes and sweets and enjoyed her food. By the last stages of her life she was existing on sips of water and maybe a few spoonfuls of custard every few days. She barely ate for the last three weeks of her life. People with dementia often stop eating and some are unable to swallow.

I can remember showing Nanny a picture of herself and my grandfather at Christmas time. She asked me who the old man in the picture was. She couldn't remember the gingerbread men that she used to buy me as a child or her caravan in Pendine that she visited almost weekly for many,many years. She didn't know if she had just had lunch or if she took sugar in her tea. She became totally dependant on a team of carers(all of these were fabulous) and her son(my dad) for all her needs. He had several, regular meetings with case workers and professionals to secure funding for her additional care needs.As her illness grew worse she needed more and more people to care for her. Teams of carers visited three times a day and once in the night. A nurse visited weekly. Social workers visited.Every visitor was a stranger to Nanny as she did not recognise them. I know that she was frightened and very scared at times when strange people appeared in her bedroom in the morning. She didn't like having male carers looking after her either as she was from  generation where all care givers were women.

This very proud,independent lady had no dignity for the last few years of her life. She became doubly incontinent,with no sense of smell or taste. She could not speak but occasionally I think she understood what was going on. Her eyes looked up like a child from her hospital bed. She looked frightened but obviously couldn't vocalise what she was feeling.She was bed-ridden,shrivelled and waiting to die.I think she almost returned to a child like state.A baby really.Curled upin a cot bed,sleeping all day. I cannot thank the nurses enough in Ysbyty Cwm Rhondda for her excellent care. They showed compassion,tenderness and compassion.

I am crying my eyes out writing this. If I could have given her something to end the suffering then I would gladly have done so. Until you have watched somebody die in this was I do not think that you can truly appreciate how agonising and cruel it is. Gradually,over time, parts of the person that you love vanish. I feel that my Nan died 2 years before her actual death.It seemed very cruel that she stayed alive for so long and had to endure more and more suffering.I hope that research may be able to find a cure for this disease so that people do not have to love with such a cruel affliction.We must put an end to the misery endured by thousands every year. Families also need support and guidance.Thank you for your support.

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