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Over the last three years I have suffered five miscarriages. When I had first miscarriage in 2019, I couldn’t believe it when I started bleeding after seeing my baby’s heartbeat. A follow up scan two weeks later confirmed that they could no longer see a pregnancy. I was told it was “bad luck” and to try again. 

The same thing happened in my second pregnancy in the summer of 2020. I was alone in a room with the scanner due to COVID when they told me that my baby no longer had a heartbeat and again it was just “bad luck”. I asked for the baby to be tested but was told I need three miscarriages to qualify for any investigations and two miscarriages were still very common and not to worry. 

At this stage we went privately for investigations, and I was put on treatment for elevated Natural Killer Cells. At my 12  week scan in February 2021 I was told my baby had died at 11 weeks (a missed miscarriage) and scheduled for surgery to remove the pregnancy. He was a genetically normal boy.

My fourth pregnancy that summer we ramped up all the drugs, immunosuppressants, hormones, blood thinners, but that pregnancy didn’t make if past a few days. 

We finally moved onto IVF, and after three rounds transferred a tested, genetically normal embryo in May 2022. I miscarried again.

We have seen so many specialists, but nobody really knows what is going on because it’s not an area that has been really focused on. 

Tommy’s are trying to find out more about miscarriage, why they happen and trying to provide support for women when they do. It’s a taboo subject and it shouldn’t be. One in four women miscarry and 1% suffer recurrent miscarriage. 

If anyone has read this far and wants to donate to that would be great so fewer people end up with a story like mine… 

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