Thank you for thinking about donating. I know many of you may be thinking about it for the sheer amusement of seeing me fall flat on my face in the London marathon, but I thought I would put down a little bit about why exactly I'm running ... and why I've asked Refuge whether I can run for them.

 

For those of you who don't know, Refuge is a charity helping people suffering from domestic abuse. And shockingly, not only do one in four women go through domestic violence, but one woman every three days takes their own life just to escape it, feeling like there is no other way out. Such as Gurjit Dhaliwal, a successful career woman with children, who opened her back door one day, walked to an outbuilding and hanged herself. She had suffered years of mental and physical abuse, and her own home, the one place you should feel safe, had become a literal hellish prison, like for so many people.

 

People often say "well, they can just leave", but it's not that simple. By the time the abuser lays their first violent hand on their partner (or child), the relationship will often have undergone years of slow burning, increasing non-violent manipulation and control - mind games, putting the other person down, often isolating them from family and friends, and making them feel worthless and depressed. Their self confidence can be so crushed by the time the violence starts, that they can't see any way out. And don't underestimate the significance of shock and denial - thinking that this could really not be happening to you. They may want to escape but not want their partner (or parent) to spend time in prison, and so feel immense guilt at getting the police involved and supporting prosecutions. And this is why Refuge and similar organisations are so important - they provide emergency accommodation, advocates to help with civil and criminal cases, outreach workers, amongst a number of other services.

This is just a snapshot of why I really do think Refuge is invaluable, and can do so much with the money. And why I'm prepared to risk public humiliation by attempting to run the London Marathon!

 

I've pledged to raise at least £1800. Anything you feel able to donate would be massively helpful. And feel free to come along on the day and cheer / laugh / take embarrassing lifelong photos!

 

Thanks!