Previously  physically active and healthy, I was diagnosed with brain cancer back in August 2021. 

Technical name: Glioblastoma Multiforme. This highly aggressive cancer has an average UK survival time of just 12-15 months. In some circles, it's known as the "Terminator". Less than 5% survive 5 years. When survival rates for many other cancers have been, thankfully improving, this isn't the case with GBM4. Only 1 in 100,000 contract it, it's relatively rare, which probably goes some way to explaining a shortfall in research funding. It doesn't have same 'headline' appeal!

Back to my story. I underwent brain surgery to remove as much of the tumour as possible, followed by 6 weeks of daily radiotherapy and started what was supposed to be a further 6 months of chemotherapy. 

Up until Easter 2022, things to appeared to be going well. I began a phased return to work in February, building to 4 days. I was riding my bike more regularly (up to 190 miles a week). My life seemed to be slowly getting back to some sort of 'maladjusted' normality!

Then over Easter, within a couple of weeks of having a clear MRI scan, I started to develop focal seizures. I was assured at the time that these may be delayed side effects due to radiotherapy. I started a course of anti seizure medication. It took several weeks to get these better under control and due to other symptoms that had appeared, my 3 month scan was brought forwards to 30th May.

The previously clear scan was now showing "significant regrowth in aggressive manner". In a matter of weeks, things had radically changed. It was now quite likely I might not even survive 12 months. I was distraught. 

The course of chemotherapy had been ineffective and would be stopped immediately. 

Out of treatment options, I was being moved across to palliative care services, to include Dorothy House Hospice, near Bath. 

The size of the swelling around the tumour site necessitated restarting steroid treatment. This has significantly impacted day to day activity.  I am struggling to read, write, concentrate and my memory is failing me. Physically, I have been progressively losing strength, muscular co-ordination and balance on my right hand side. I have impaired peripheral vision. I keep misjudging and bumping into things.  My awareness of my arm in space and limited proprioceptive feedback now means I have to have to watch my hand to an object. Its frightening space to inhabit . 

The days of riding my bike seem at an end. 

Difficult as it is to find motivation when faced with such short-term terminal diagnosis, I simply need do something to get me up and moving each day. 

I've been really fortunate to get to celebrate both my wife and son's birthdays in recent days. I've had a raft of very dear and valued family members and friends visit. It has been, in so many ways such a special period, at time when I was looking to retreat rapidly from the world.

So my challenge for now is to try and now row 100,000 meters in 14 days. 

Yet, I still long to get back on my bike once again and ride on into a sunset! If I still get a say in proceedings, I will get as far as that!

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.