LEJOG Unfiltered.

Follow my daily updates here: https://instagram.com/dave_unfiltered

I'm walking LEJOG for Headway, supporting life after brain injury.

Like everyone, our family found Covid difficult: trying to keep a business going; balancing WFH with childcare; not seeing family for 12 months. Yet our hardest experience was hidden. I was secretly struggling with debilitating neurological and psychological trauma (that I didn't even understand) from brain injuries playing rugby.

Externally I tried to be a positive influence but Covid meant over a year of cancelled medical appointments. I was scared and lonely. On the day we found out our long awaited Christmas 2020 plans with family were cancelled I was as low as a person can be. My sole remaining motivation was my wife and children, but I was also acutely aware they were stuck in a house with me at my worst.

One day, my daughter Willow asked me why I was sad. I explained that I was just tired and poorly but I was trying to be happy for everyone.

"What makes you happy Daddy?" she asked. I told her that "spending time with you, Ash and your mum makes me happy. Like when we go for a walk". 

"Let's go for a walk then Daddy" she said.

So we did.

We walked every day; just the two of us. The miles built up, and the fog imperceptibly lifted. I was still a wreck but it was a glimpse of hope...and those little daily walks, usually chatting and singing; sometimes just walking in comfortable silence, were the life support I needed to make it through the darkness and, as the world opened up, I finally received the medical support I needed and completely overhauled my life. I started a psychology Masters to understand more about trauma and brain injuries, I started walking and running hundreds of km every month and I've been sober for 18 months. Walking with Willow saved my life.

Why 'unfiltered'? I've experienced various symptoms of TBIs but the most socially difficult is disinhibition. I've changed from someone once praised for their rhetorical skills and tact to someone struggling daily to process and monitor everything I say to avoid accidentally oversharing or offending anyone. It's under control 99% of the time and it can even be a blessing. Sometimes telling the truth is seen as refreshingly authentic. So this is a warts and all account of how walking, nature and storytelling can heal.

I want to support others who have been through the trauma of brain injuries . It's not a sexy cause. I knew nothing about until it turned my life upside down. TBIs send about 160,000 to hospital in the UK each year, about 1.3 million people are living with disabilities resulting from these injuries, and an estimated 60% of adult offenders in the UK have had a TBI, six times higher than the rate among the wider population. Something close to you will probably be affected at some point and yet until that happens you've probably heard very little of the impact.

This is the first time in my life I've had the opportunity to take 2 months off work and it's the last time my daughter will have the freedom to join me throughout such an adventure before starting school. I'd love you to join me/us. I've been asked to write about and document the experience (more to come) and would love to talk to anyone who wants to join me for a wee ramble to share their story about: trauma, neuro-diversity, mental health, brain injury and if/how they have found solace and healing in nature, walking or adventure. Please email dave@foundryfit.com and I'll see you on the trail!