Finding the words to support a parent who has lost a child is often a very difficult situation, for both the parent and the person having to find something to say. 

For me, both of these drove me crazy...

I am a mum, I had my baby - why would it upset me, I mean..yeh it does upset me but it was the best 9 months of my life and talking about my baby always puts a smile on my face, its my job to keep her memory alive and for her to go unacknowledged makes me feel like she is being forgotten. 

Now, the cliche's, 'God give's his hardest battles to his strongest soldiers', 'time is a great healer, you will be fine', 'she is in a better place', 'you are still young, you can have more children'. I understand that people meant well with all of these - but at that time...I didn't want to be one of God's solider's, I didn't want time to heal, and I couldn't even think about more children, I just wanted my baby back in my arms, to laugh, to cry, to smile. 

Sometimes its the smallest of things that make the biggest impact, somebody giving you a hug, or a message to say they are thinking of you, seeing you are online at 2am and saying hi, or simply just being there for you when you break down to hold your hand. 

And these things don't fade with time, I'm 4 years down the line and I still have these moments, if anything its worse as people move on and forget, but i will never forget my baby and she is always in my heart and in my thoughts. 

Child loss is not a point in life where grief passes and you learn to live with out a person, its that everyday thought of 'what would you look like' 'who would you be like'. Every morning. Every day. Every night. 

Please help to support those that have lost a child in this tragic way, by being there and saying that little something to put a smile back on there face when they are having a low day. 

Thank you for reading my story.