As many of you know we sadly lost my Dad 'old livy' to Alzheimers last year. With pandemic restrictions now easing we are lucky to be in a position where we can take him home and I promised to do this. Last month I began to think about the long car journey home but looking at one particular photo (the cover for this page) has made me reconsider the journey.  

The photo was taken the day mum and dad were leaving their home, their country and their family and friends to come live with us in the granny annex in Dorset.  It is a real bitter-sweet moment but what the photo might not convey to everyone is the courage it took to make that decision. 

Dad was a proud man who looked after his family.  He was fiercely independent. He loved cycling and walking. He loved Kilmallie Shinty club. He loved Lochaber. He didn't want to leave but he knew enough to know he had to and he had the courage to make the decision when he did.  Most associate memory loss as the prime factor relating to Alzheimers but many will not be aware of the crippling anxiety that comes from not knowing.  It is highly debilitating to live in fear every waking moment of your life but despite this dad had the courage, whilst he was still able, to make this very hard decision; and this really resonated with me. 

As I get older I find myself procrastinating more and more, waiting for the perfect opportunity to do 'x' or dreaming of the perfect life but I'm in danger of letting life slip by. 'When I win the lottery I will' ...but I don't even buy a lottery ticket! Sound familiar? So, enough! Life is supposed to be a daring adventure, so I'm going to take a leaf out of the old fella's book and start making courageous decisions again. I'm going knowing I'll never be 100% ready for anything and I hope me doing this might raise some cash but also perhaps help others decide they can do 'their thing' too. But what? 

“When the spirits are low, when the day appears dark, when work becomes monotonous, when hope hardly seems worth having, just mount a bicycle and go out for a spin down the road, without thought on anything but the ride you are taking.”

Dad loved his cycling so I plan to carry him home on a bike and show him some of the old country on the way. I decided this last month and despite the fear it may fail at any point I am going. I'm not ready. My calf is in the process of mending again. My knees are trashed. I have hardly cycled this year. I will miss my family. There will be thousands of murderous midges. It's definitely not the ideal time but it is the time. It might not work...but it just might. We are going and we will enjoy it.

The route. I aim to cycle along a mix of tarmac, trails, and tracks through Scotland (S to N and hopefully E to W) and I will carry everything I need on a very heavy bike. I'll try to visit places he loved; Edinburgh, Glasgow, Loch Lomond, Aberfoyle, his favourite chippy in Callander, Killin, Corrour and over the Cairngorms to Fort Augustus. Fitness permitting I'll go North through Cannich, Struy, Loch Vaich, Oykel Bridge, Alt na Caillach, Strathmore Ford and take a breath at Cape Wrath and then home to Lochaber. I will wild camp where possible but also take advantage of any 'hostelry of opportunity' along the way.  I want it to be a challenge but I also want it to be fun. Weather will make it tricky on the off-road sections and the pandemic will play a big factor. Covid has already caused havoc to my plans with many route changes over the last few days. I genuinely have no idea how far I will get but I know I will start and I know I will do the last leg into Lochaber.  

I will visit all the old haunts in Lochaber on the way to dads final resting place in Glen Nevis. Whilst the last leg of any journey is probably the most poignant ,and I guess this will be true of this adventure, it is not the end. This may be a journey about saying good bye but it is also about being grateful for what we have and remembering to live.  Every day offers a new opportunity but it is up to each of us to take those forward steps. The pandemic has not been easy for anyone and I hope my journey inspires others. Perhaps you will have your own adventures and even visit 'old livy' in Glen Nevis to tell him your story.  He would enjoy that. 

It seems right to put fear and anxiety behind us and I hope for a memorable journey home that would have made the old fella laugh. Four wheels might carry his body home but two will carry his soul and he would secretly enjoy my suffering. Actually he'd be laughing his head off and calling me a 'wee tube' but still it just seems right to cycle through the mountains and the glens rather than to drive.  It also seems right to try to find a way to help those, like Lisa's mum, who still suffer.  So through my adventure I would also like to take the opportunity to raise some cash for Alzheimers Society. 

Alzheimer’s Society is transforming the landscape of dementia forever. Until the day we find a cure, they will attempt to create a society where those affected by dementia are supported and accepted, able to live in their community without fear or prejudice but they need money. 

Alzheimer's affects millions of people and we can make a difference. For my part, between July 17th and 31st I'll cycle as far as I can through Scotland. I will try to remember that sweating is just 'fat crying'. Whilst there are plenty of available tears and there might be a lot of 'crying' we can definitely make some happy tears too and that's where you come in.  For your part please dare greatly in your own life and have some of your own crazy adventures and, if you can, please donate.   

Dad is going home. 

https://youtu.be/g7cId63P65E

Have a listen (Runrig - Hearts of Olden Glory, you might need to copy the link).

Live with courage. Enjoy your journey. Smile.