This is the most hardest and most personal thing I have ever written but I have decided now even more so with the current Covid situation life is too short and if what I say helps me and many others in my situation I will be proud of myself for doing this. So here goes My Story! 

From an early age there were signs I was hard of hearing but I would never except it. School was hard I missed many things the teachers said as I couldn't hear them, but I was cool I wanted to sit at the back of the class with my friends! Kids shout when they talk so I could hear my friends so I was happy with putting it to the back of my mind.If only I didn't think of my pride and asked for help the things I could have learnt! Nursery rhymes  I thought said something else I found out were different when I had a child myself!

Next was getting a job, I went for something I love most 'Numbers' and 'Problem solving' I went into accountants and also completed an NVQ in Business administration.Things were hard and I took on double the pressure as I was embarrassed to tell people I couldn't hear. I can Lip read so I got around a lot of things that way, but I stuck at it not giving up and now being with the same employer nearly 20 years. Missing the office gossip and the jokes were tough making me feel isolated and looked at as being rude or non-friendly for not joining in the conversation. Missing office parties and nights out as I would worry I would not hear people in certain environments. This was the time in my early 20's I asked the doctors for help. I was sent for hearing tests and the worse day in my life came I was given a pair of NHS hearing aids. They were big and brown and I felt awful. My confidence went that day I felt like an outsider, and I started to act like one to by shutting myself away. Cancelling going out with friends and not making an effort to make new friends. I was like this for years but just got on with it.Then the day came when I got a loan to get some private  hearing aids. Yes while everyone was getting loans for nice cars, houses and holidays I was getting them for hearing aids. I was always broke and no one knew why as I didn't want people to know I had hearing aids. But after getting the new digital hearing aids I found them Brilliant! I also could hear a lot better then the NHS ones and they were so small you could hardly notice them.The first day in the office with them I jumped out my skin as I thought a plane was going to hit the building until my colleague told me it was the printer! I started to hear things I had never heard before in my life and my confidence was slowly coming back, but hearing aids are like phones , the technology always gets better over the years. So more loans and new hearing aids. By this point I was a single parent. This is when the anxiety hit me like a ton of bricks! I was caring for someone else, what if I couldn't hear him when he needed me? I have a video baby monitor and started wearing my hearing aids to bed to. The constant anxiety and fear never goes away and I never can switch off. Don't get me wrong its been so hard but I am still going strong and there are people worse off than me. 

Now I am looking into the future in which my next wish will be being able to get a hearing dog to transform my life forever. Reading the stories of people when the have received one are amazing and I am counting the days until I too can write a review on the Hearing Dogs for Deaf people website saying how my life has changed forever. Due to the current Covid situation I haven't even being able to get on the waiting list yet and i'm sure this list will be very long as many others like myself want to change their lives for the better. This is why Hearing Dogs for Deaf people need all the support they can get towards dogs, training etc for people like me!

I have decided to help by doing the 28 day challenge which myself and 6 year old son will be walking 1 mile a day for 28 days. I would be most grateful for your support by sponsoring me!

Now you know a little more about me please I don't want you to feel sorry for me or act different with me its still me I am normal! a sponsor would be great! but if this isn't possible just remember for me next time someone says pardon don't roll yours eyes as getting that look is the worst feeling ever and makes people shut themselves away. Also wearing masks for the Covid situation remember some people count on Lip reading which this makes it impossible !

Many thanks for your time 

Gemma x