Thank you for taking the time to visit my JustGiving page. 

27th June 2013 is a date the is forever etched into my shattered heart. My beautiful son was born fast asleep. 

This was my first but very healthy pregnancy. Words cannot express how excited i was. Watching my bump grow each week. Feeling the first little flutters of my little boy moving, then came the kicks. I loved every part of my pregnancy, sickness and all. The weeks were flying by and we were getting more and more excited to meet our little boy. On 25th June (just 5 1/2 short weeks from my due date) we went for a routine midwife appointment. Everything was going fine up until the point she tried to check his heartbeat. She was struggling to find it which had happened before when he was hiding behind the placenta. This time was different. She sent me to the hospital to have them check it instead and she said not to worry which was easier said than done! 

The journey to the hospital felt like hours when in fact it was just 15 minutes away. We were seen straight away and the midwife again tried to find Harley's heartbeat but she still couldn't. I then had to have a scan but i already knew what it would confirm. That my beautiful little Harley was gone. A consultant came in the room and started doing the scan and i could see my little boy on the monitor. His little feet were still, his hands were still and so was his little heart. In that moment my heart shattered and i lost a piece of it forever. 

I pushed my silent little angel into the world 2 days later on 27th June. I prayed so much for him to cry but the room stayed silent. Even holding him i was watching his chest waiting for it to rise and fall but it never did. I waited 7 1/2 months to hold my baby boy but i held an angel instead. 

13 months on, every day is still a struggle to get through without my son but to be able to do something in his memory for a charity as amazing as SANDS is motivation to carry on.I have always said that nothing and no one will ever get me to jump out of a plane but this is for my son, my angel, my world. I want to make him proud of his mummy and i am determined to do that as long as there is breath in my body.

I will be doing my skydive on what would have been his original due date August 4th. It feels like the perfect time to do it. Face a fear knowing that Harley will be with me every step of the way.

SANDS is an amazing charity that does amazing work at such a heartbreaking, tragic time that no parent should ever go through and i am so honored to be helping, even in a small way.