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As a mother of 3 daughters and 1 son I couldn't believe the joy my 3 grandsons Jayden, Tyler and Jesse have bought into my life, the unconditional love we share is so special, spending time with them and seeing them grow is something I truly  treasure, each of them is so different, they have their own personalities and little ways. I see the things I love and cherish in my own children in them, their looks, their moods, their funny characters, I also see my parents and brother that are no longer with us, they some how keep them alive and our family close.

When Gemma gave me my birthday gift of 'Mum I'm pregnant and It's Twins' I was so happy, this special gift had been sent to our family, the thought of 2 more little souls coming into our family was something none of us could wait for, we planned everything, and started buying things, the whole family attended the scans and each time we got more excited, then we found out it was twin boys (.Teddy and Corey) ...I would have 5 grandsons!!! The whole family couldn't wait for the arrival day!

....then at 24 weeks we got the devastating news that something was wrong with Corey, all our lives came to a standstill, the news was not good and the chances of Corey surviving the final few weeks of the pregnancy or long after birth were extremely slim. 

After 3 weeks of watching tiny Corey fight to survive he finally lost his battle to live, at 27 weeks he passed away, his brother unaware and still thriving.  

Coming to terms with what had happened was a struggle for us all, mixed emotions would change our perspective daily, however we had to all accept what had happened and that Gemma and Lewis had to carry on with the pregnancy for Teddy's sake, we all had to deal with our loss and support Gemma.

The next 5 weeks were spent in and out of hospital as Gemma's body fought with the turmoil that it wanted to give birth but also had to carry on feeding and helping Teddy grow, during this time we all prepared for the day when we would celebrate Teddy's birth but also have to deal with of grief of losing Corey.

At 32 weeks Gemma's body could cope no longer and a c section was arranged. Teddy and Corey were born on the 4th September 2015 at 19.18 and 19.21.

Dealing with Losing Corey has been one of the hardest parts of my life, although for Corey's sake I am glad he didn't suffer any longer than he had to or endure a painful birth to be kept alive for a short time on machines but not being able to have ever seen his soul, look into his eyes, feel him grip my finger or kiss his warm cheek when he was born was heart breaking, it was too late for any of those things and knowing I will never be able to share with him the times I share with my other grandchildren brings an intense pain to my heart and tears to my eyes, he is always in my thoughts.

Losing Corey also meant I had to watch my daughter go through pain mentally and physically, helplessly witnessing my child lose her child was beyond words, the long weary  journey she had no choice to travel and one I could do nothing about was earth shattering.

When Corey was born he was put a tiny knitted a hat and wrapped in a beautiful blanket in a tiny mosses basket, we spent time with him taking in his features, stroking his tiny fingers and toes and we kissed him good night.  Gemma and Lewis received his name tags, medical numbers, hand and foot prints and photos, all presented to her in a beautiful box filled with Corey's life and our memories of him along with supporting material to help them with their grief. 

Please donate and help make sure all parents, who have had the gift of a child taken from them before they could even feel the warmth of blood running through their veins or see life in their eyes,  get this memory box gift...its their memories that their child existed, is loved and who's memory will survive.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and donate it is much appreciated.

Jacquie

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