In January 2020, a friend said she was running the GNR and did I want to join her. After initially falling around the floor laughing at the hilarity of the request, I decided it would be a great way to challenge myself in 2020. My friend was running for a charity close to her heart, which in turn made me think of what charitable cause was close to my heart, and I guess that is really where my story begins. 

I chose MIND, because of my own personal journey and struggle with my mental health over recent years. For most of you, it will be the first time you are hearing this, for others, you have been painfully aware of the highs and lows of my struggles with mental health. 

Almost 8 years ago, I sadly lost my Mam, and unbeknown to me, it was the delayed grief that lead to my first episode of depression. I didn't even know what those feelings were, but I felt some days like the sun wouldn't come up, I didn't want to leave the house, and I had a constant feeling of sadness that surrounded me. My husband noticed, but to anyone else, you wouldn't know because I hid it well, because that's the thing with mental health, it's what you can't see that is the issue. Once diagnosed, I still didn't tell anyone, because I felt ashamed and weak that I was feeling like this, and that is part of my reason for choosing MIND, is to help support the conversation on mental health and getting people to open up, and reducing the stigma surrounding mental illnesses. 

I was very fortunate to be able to get help privately and through some counselling, CBT and assertiveness training, I slowly over the course of 12 months started to feel myself getting better, and there were many more sunny days than dark days in my life. 

Fast forward a couple more years, and I had my beautiful twins, a time which should be filled with joy and happy memories (as well as lots of sleepless nights), but for me, in those first 6- 9 months it wasn't, I knew I was slipping back into depression again, because I could recognise those feelings creeping back in, I felt so lonely, there were days when I didn't want to be here, and felt that my twins deserved a better mother, my mood was constantly low, combined with the lack of sleep that comes with babies, I knew I was suffering from post natal depression and I needed help, for me and for my family. 

However, this time around I didn't feel ashamed, for some reason it felt acceptable to be feeling like this, and I was so much more open to discussing this with family, friends and other Mum's, it felt like there wasn't as much of a stigma attached to post natal depression. But many people do still feel like there is a stigma attached to mental health illnesses and that's what we need to change. 

So here I was again, but this time with twins, and I got help from my wonderful supportive family, medication and more sessions with my super CBT therapist.

Fast forward to the year the world ground to a halt, the year the pandemic hit us all, a time where we couldn't see our loved ones, and our normal lives and routines were turned on its head. I thought I was doing ok, very conscious of how this could impact my mental health, but 6 months into it, I wasn't ok and I asked for help again, which came in the form of talking therapy with a wonderful lady, who has been pivotal in helping me understand the root cause of my feelings.

So you can see why I chose MIND, I was very fortunate to be able to access private mental health services, and have a very supportive husband and family to get me through, but not everyone does, and that's why the work and services of MIND are so important, and that's why we need to remove the stigma on mental health, and open up the conversation.

This is MY story, and MY reasoning for running for mental health charity, MIND.

Support me, and support the fight against mental health. For them, for me, for us, and for you- we must take this chance to step up the fight for mental health. Be part of the change, for fairness, for respect, and for life changing support.