My face from the first training session says it all, utter confusion. Why am I doing this? Why won't my feet do what I tell them? Why are the steps for 1 dance in groups of 3 when as far as I can tell the music is in 4/4 time? Why would I embarrass myself in front of the good people of Banbury?

Yes it's partly so people will stop asking me if I'm going to do Strictly Banbury and yes those people that assume I'm a good dancer are people who have never seen me dance... 

Raising money for great causes, entertaining people through my incompetence and demonstrating there's more to the job than the uniform.

Dig deep if you can, turn up on 31st March or April Fools day if you want your senses tortured.