Daddy,

The last 20 years have been perfect, you gave us the most perfect childhood, and have been the best role model. You have been so loving and caring.  We cannot put into words how much we love you, it has always been just the four of us, in the centre of my world. 

I remember the first time you told me you had cancer, I screamed and screamed until I was sick, but you told me you were going to be okay, and they could treat you. At this time you didnt tell us that the survival rate for oesophogial cancer was just 7%, you are not a smoker or a drinker, just unlucky.

You started chemo and got on really well, just felt a bit 'sea sick', you kept all of your hair and enjoyed a lovely summer off work. we spent so much time together; walking the dog on my day off, for meals, cycling and day trips. 
Little did any of us know the reason that the chemotherapy didn't make you sick was because the cancer was immune to this type of chemo, so, it was essentially doing nothing.

Then in September you had the operation to remove the tumor and showed how strong and how much of a fighter you were, spending just a week in hospital (insted of the estimated 2 weeks). 

After this things started looking up, you was going mountain biking again (your favorite thing ever), and went back to work, we had an amazing Christmas, the best ever that will always stay in our hearts.

We all thought you were going to be okay, and you had beat it, until you started getting a pain in your side, then the weight started falling of you. After tests we found out the cancer had spread, and was aggressive and incurable. 

We had to face the fact that you had terminal cancer.

Watching your body fail you was the hardest thing ever, watching every day beome more of a struggle. You must have been in agony but you never complained once. It was unbearable, you wanted to live so much but this disease had a grip of you, and it wasn't letting you go no matter how hard you fought it and how much we wished with all our hearts it would just go away.

Things got really bad and the hospital couldn't do anything, we were all frightened, then we found Katharine house. I can't imagine what we would have done without them, they stabalised your medication, stopped you from hurting so much, and put things in place so you could come home. 

We had 10 amazing days at home with you, I will cherish them forever, but cancer is cruel and you started getting weaker and weaker and weaker, the cancer was taking everything. We had to go back into the hospice,where things got worse.

You became unconscious, we all stayed there night and day not leaving your side. You would stir every few hours for a drink, then the time came when you couldn't tell us what it was you wanted any more, but then you would come around for a second and tell us you love us. These precious moments will stay with us. 

It took all of your energy, but you still did it-that's you all over!
When the end came we were all with you; holding you, telling you how much we loved you, as your heartbeat became fainter and fainter we kept telling you again and again how much.

I said to you "Dad we love you so much, but you already know it don't you" and with your final breath you muttered 'yes'.
Then you fell asleep in our arms. 

We already miss you so so much, you were the best Father/Husband anyone could ever ask for, you loved us so much, and we loved you back so much too. We're glad we were there for you through everything.

If we could cure people with love, you would have never gotten sick. Im so thankful we could be such a comfort for you, through everything you went through. 

<3 <3 We love you.

We cant thank Katharine house hospice enough for what they have done for us, but this is one way please donate all you can it means the world to us <3

 

We added up the money from the Funeral (£450) and have added it to the 'Offline Donations' total. 

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Updated on Jun 24th 2012 at 1:10 AM

Wow. Over £1000 in 24 hours. We are overwhelmed by your support!!! I think this reflects how loved and special he was too so many x