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My name is Amy, my husband and I have two beautiful children and decided we wanted another addition to our family we were absolutely thrilled to learn we were expecting and started planning for the future. 

April 26th 2016 I was 8 weeks and it was the day before I was due to have my first midwife check up, I'd had a few pains but thought nothing of it as had this type of pain in previous pregnancies so put it down to being normal.

We were excited for the next few days my husband had booked a few days off work as it was my birthday on the 28th April so had planned a few days out.

Later that day I had pain in my right side and gradually got worse to the point I had collapsed on the sofa and was unable to sit up as I felt dizzy nauseous and sick and like something had popped inside. My husband phoned an ambulance as it was apparant he couldn't get me up to get to the hospital. Paramedics came and my blood pressure dropped quite low and I fainted rushed to hospital by this time I had shoulder tip pain.

Once at hospital the doctors then told us the devastating news i was suffering an ectopic pregnancy my right Fallopian tube had burst and I was bleeding internally. I was then rushed into emergency open surgery to save my life. I was then to spend the next few days in hospital including my birthday which was awful.

Six to twelve weeks for physical recovery but the mental recovery for us both is still on going it was so traumatic and upsetting for us all. 

We were devastated we couldn't believe it it all happened so fast one minute we were excited to be expecting next minute it was torn from us.

Double ectopic 16th august 2017

5th July took first pregnancy test first trip to doctors on the Friday then sent off for blood test then start of a long process to epu for many blood test willing for my hug levels to increase at one time they did and we were hopeful told family we were expecting again so happy went for a scan the following week nothing found after few more tests and scan told it wasn't found in uterus so had to have methotrexate to avoid surgery our world crashed down this baby wasn't where it should be but wasn't in the danger area or so we thought first injection failed to to bring my levels down and before I had my second dose another scan done the sonographer thought and showed us what we also thought was a sac in my c section scar I panicked but was told the pregnancy wasn't viable and the second dose would treat it levels started to come down had blood tests once a week went on holiday spent time with kids felt ok... then Wednesday 16th august I had on and off pain but usually helped with painkillers but woke up early weds morning to bad pain on my left radiating across my lower abdomen took painkillers didn't help took a second lot didn't help so phoned the hospital told me to go in they scanned me told me I had free fluid around my uterus but couldn't see anything so got admitted once finally saw surgeon was reluctant to operate as said I seemed well and things seemed ok but needed to check my iron felt a bit of relief but still had pain but later surgeon came back said they was taking me to theatre had a slow bleed so scared now. Back from theatre told next day was ectopic in my left and had ruptured and tube removed now have no tubes my fertility had gone just like that's !!

How do I feel shocked numb heartbroken like iv been hit hard I managed to get back up now iv been hit hard again my fertility has gone no more pregnancy for me the door is firmly shut for me to ever grow another life in me the fact is those babies life's were growing but in the wrong place and would have killed me if they kept growing in fact almost did first time how I got to 10 weeks I don't no all we wanted was another child and now that is over for us naturally

So I am doing this challenge in memory of our little ones lost so soon and my own well being to keep fit and have something to focus on to gain strength to get through the awful events In 2016 and 2017.

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