Alfred, My Son, My Warrior, My Guardian Angel.

For whatever reasons you knew your chances of survival were likely to be greater on the outside, you took that risk and we were left with no choice but to follow your lead... stubborn, determined and probably right (obviously traits you have inherited from your mother).

Your entrance to this world was nothing short of dramatic but luckily for all of us the Doctors and midwives were on hand to save you and give you the immediate care you needed that my body could no longer provide.

You were stabilised and taken from us by St Peters hospital into their specialist Neo Natal unit in Chertsey, but it was ok – you needed their help urgently and Mummy and Daddy were close behind you. Your transport team from St Peters were nothing short of incredible and they ensured you arrived into their unit safely and stable.

The care you received at St Peters was impeccable and with the help of everyone around you were growing stronger by the hour. You kept fighting my little warrior, and you defined all odds. The team were fantastic - they kept Mummy and Daddy informed and included us in every decision made about your care and treatment. We were part of your team too and more than anything they were compassionate and kind, providing us with comfort and strength.

With the help of the team we both helped change your nappy, wash you, feed you, read to you and comfort you. We were able to hold you and the team couldn't have been better at allowing us to create ever lasting memories together that we will cherish forever. You continued to amaze us all with your strength, determination and wilfulness, yet unfortunately my Son you were unable to recover from the catastrophic damage done to you during delivery.

Nearly five days we had with you. Nearly five days of you receiving the utmost care from the team at St Peters, whom we will be eternally grateful to. Your tiny footprints, my dear boy, have made the greatest imprints on our hearts. 

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Alfred's Neonatal Intensive care cot costs in the region of £80,000 to fully equip, and the ultrasound machine that scanned his heart and his head over and over, cost in the region of £60,000. The equipment to help Alfred to breathe would have cost up to £20,000 providing him with the important life support he needed during his stay in Neo Natal. A breast milk pasteurizer costs £19,000 - being able to feed my own baby gave me a purpose in his short life.*

They also provide specialist accommodation for parents of critical babies, providing tea, coffee and food - which allowed us to spend every precious moment of our time with Alfred. They provided activity packs and balloons for Elsie and the sibling play area was well equipped with toys so she was able to associate seeing her brother with enjoyment. They also provided a selection of tiny new baby clothes for us to choose from to allow us to dress our boy and send him on the final part of his journey with the dignity he deserved. 

Please help us to raise funding to allow St Peters to continue the fantastic job they do and help other babies who have entered this world before their time have the very best start in life. Equipment will need maintaining,  upgrading and replacing and the specialist team there will require continued training that may not be funded by the NHS - any money donated will help to ensure that this dedicated team are able to continue the amazing work they do.