Abbie's Story

“To shave or not to shave?".......that is the question. 

Have you ever in your life had to ask yourself that question....about the hair on your head?

As I type this, I sit here having had two chemotherapy treatments for grade 3 breast cancer.

“So, your results show that there is a sign of cancer in your right breast” I was told on the 3rd December 2020  “It’s quite an aggressive type so we’d like you to start chemotherapy very soon....before Christmas”. (Bang goes my family Christmas bubble we were allowed for one day!) How in the hell do you compute that information when actually you were told a few months prior that the mass you felt in your boob was just excess fibrous tissue??!! I was in total shock hearing the news! I did not expect to hear those words muttered. And I was on my own due to Covid rulings of attending hospital by oneself. And also because I was in denial, I guess, and thought it would be just fine. How wrong was I?

The oncology specialist spoke the words very clearly and concisely and in a matter of fact manner (I’m not blaming her one bit); I still thought I was hearing things. I was silent for a few minutes trying to take it all in then the reality hit me.....and the tears came in floods. And even more so when I was handed the ‘chemotherapy and hair loss’ brochure to take away.

So, I started treatment on 18th December. It’s a big lump I’m told....10cm...gosh...that IS big!!

Not only that but I’m told I may probably need a mastectomy after the chemo as it’s spread to the lymph nodes, then radiotherapy and then reconstruction of my one breast.

But do you know what, everyone, I’m going to kick cancer’s ass, I can promise you all that!!!! 

I’ve been using the scalp cooling cap they suggest to try and give my hair a 50% chance of staying put but it was really thinning, coming out in droves in my hand every time I ran my hands through it or combed it through.

'I’m so sorry, hair, I will never be frustrated with you again. When you grow back, I will never shout at you when you don’t style the right way, I’ll never complain that you’re too curly to handle and too wayward to tame. I’m sorry. Please come back!'

Yes, it’s all a bit cr*p this situation I find myself in but I’m determined to beat this and am keeping a very positive mindset. And with my fighting spirit, and I quote from Deepak Chopra’s, Quantum Healing, ‘When you’re feeling brave and invincible, your body is making neuro peptides similar to interleukin 2, which is one of the most powerful chemicals to fight cancer cells'. So, a done deal eh folks?

So, back to the point.....the decision to ‘brave the shave’ has been made and I could literally cry at the thought. Will I be able to look at myself in the mirror with no hair? [Cue...polishing up my makeup application.] But my head was starting to itch badly and I had pins and needles going on in that area. I felt it was time. I was ready....but was I emotionally ready?

My beautiful, awesome and brave friend, Kelly, who I’ve known since we were 12 years old, offered to ‘hold my hand’ throughout the whole process. ‘I can’t let you do that’ I told her. She was insistent. I kept saying to Kelly that she didn’t have to do shave her perfectly good, well-behaving head of hair but somehow I felt I was taking away her will and her want to help me through this particularly painful time.

My special, truly wonderful and supportive lifelong friend, I will always remember what you’re doing for me....ALWAYS.

COVID-19 is stopping us from doing this in person but here we ‘stand together’ using the wonder of technology, metaphorically holding hands, to carry out the deed.

Wish us luck!

Kelly's Story: 

If you are reading this page then you already know how special Abbie is!  I can’t remember a time when Abbie wasn’t by my side. She has always been there for me through the good and the bad times as I am sure she has been for many of you. She even forgave me for forgetting her birthday one year; she is the much better friend in our relationship.

When Abbie told me she had cancer and after the swearing and tears finally subsided, I knew there was one thing I could do for her. I knew that if the time came, I would be there by her side, holding her hand and we would shave our heads together so she didn’t have to do it alone.

Well bloody Boris put pay to us doing it in person, so zoom it is.

I would do anything for you my darling, for the last 30 years you have been my family, the sister I never had. I feel very grateful to have you in my life and very lucky to be able to call you my friend.

You are AMAZING and STRONG and BRAVE and WONDERFUL – Love you millions.

Last word from Abbie: 

Thank you so much for taking the time to follow my story. Just by you being here I know you are a loving and caring person. Whilst I wholeheartedly appreciate your kindness, may I encourage you to show this by supporting this charity rather than contacting me on my personal and social media sites. That way I can devote my time and energy into focusing on my healing and recovery. Rest assured that your support and positive energy means the world to me. xx

Here is the link to 'The Big Shave!'  
https://youtu.be/VHcTEdleo8s

And if you would like to be kept up to date with my journey, I have set up a blog called 'Abbie's Boobie Blog'. If you feel inclined to 'follow' me, that would be just brilliant!  I'd love to build up some followers. 

http://abbiesboobieblog.com

I would also like to add that my amazing nephew, Jodi, who also wanted to stand with me on this, decided to shave his head to show support and I am so grateful to him also. 

I am feeling so blessed to have such wonderfully supportive friends and family. It really is helping me through this challenging period in my life. (See Jodi's before and after photos in the
picture gallery and below is his 'brave the shave' video).

https://youtu.be/_XN_nAeKwN0

"Cancer Hair Care is a specialist cancer charity offering FREE expert advice on all aspects of hair loss before, during and after cancer treatments. Help is on-hand to offer support to children and teenagers facing hair loss at a critical time in their life, giving them confidence when they need it most. They rely 100% on donations, so your support means so much to them, thank you."