Until a year ago I had never heard of BPD and I had no experience of mental health. It’s an awful illness and the lack of funding for treatment and support is shocking. I need to raise awareness of how the mental health system in this country is letting down our young people in particular.

Some characteristics of BPD are impulsive behaviours, self destructive behaviour, dangerous behaviour, addictive personality, they come across as manipulative, but they don’t do this on purpose, psychosis, depression, anxiety, poor judgment, poor self image, the list goes on and on. Some people with BPD cut themselves to feel something, some take overdoses to make it stop. Ella has engaged in self destructive behaviour to make it stop. Drug addiction and alcohol addiction is also very common for someone suffering with BPD.

Ella needs to start intensive treatments, she has been in hospital since January and the system only provides limited therapies, it’s a holding centre. This is a crisis in the UK with so many young people in these wards, there’s no structure to their days, they can participate in activities if they want to, they can eat if they want to, they can sleep if they want to! Please tell me how this can help someone who wants to die. They are ill, they need structure, support therapies, exercise, fresh air, good food and continuity of care.

Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) have been supportive, but there is only so much they can do. Ella is 18 in October and we were hoping she would have been discharged by now, but she’s not well enough. She has been home only twice since January and on both occasions tried to take her life. We dream about her being home with us but we can’t keep her safe.The only option is for her to be transferred onto an adult mental health ward, where it’s likely she will learn more destructive behaviours. We are desperate to get Ella the right treatment and support to get our beautiful fun loving daughter back to understanding this is a good life worth living and the mutilation of her body isn’t the life she wants to live.

I feel very uncomfortable asking for this level of help but it's out of desparation. Ella needs layers of supportive therapies where they will teach her how to understand her illness, so going forward she is equipped to cope with the condition and hopefully live a full and happy life.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. If you can be generous with your donation, the sooner we raise the money the sooner we can start her treatments and support her road to recovery. Anything you can give will be very much appreciated.