Our beautiful, articulate, intelligent and creative, now 13 year old daughter Ruby was diagosed with autism when she was 7 years old.

Ruby really struggles with social communication difficulties; executive functioning (being able to keep track of things she needs to do, and then doing them in the right order); demand avoidance (meaning that her anxiety escalates when someone asks her to do something) and sensory overload. She struggles understanding sub text in conversations, interpreting tone of voice and struggles maintaining friendships. She has severe OCD issues around germs particularly outside the house and severe sleep issues. However, she is also very academic and extremely good at 'masking' (putting on a happy face / acting as if everything is ok and she is not struggling at all). This results in a massive anxiety build up inside her which then explodes out of her later. She has regular meltdowns and panic attacks when all of this gets too much and can self harm. It also means that it has been extremely challenging to get Ruby any help over the years as people do not see her difficulties because she hides them as far as possible, until she gets home.

Ruby has not attended school since January 2024 as the secondary school system is not a tolerable place for someone like Ruby - she barely coped with primary school. She reached autistic burnout at the end of 2023 and spent months not wanting to do anything except watch tv and play SIMS on the computer. She lost all motivation to do things that she previously found pleasure in: reading, singing, playing the piano, drawing, creating, baking. She would initially only eat one thing: jacket potato, beans and cheese. Her world narrowed down to only a few things she was comfortable with. She has no friends or social life. And she barely leaves the house. She can’t even cope with sitting with us as a family for dinner because the scraping of the knife and fork on the plates are too loud for her to deal with and she finds it hard being with her younger brother and sister because they can be lively and noisy so she spends much of the time when they are home, upstairs in her small room. We have been fighting to get her an EHCP (Education and Health Care Plan) but it's a very long process, during which we are unable to work full time as someone needs to be home all the time caring for Ruby. This has a knock on affect on our whole family.

Ruby loves the company of animals and feels that they are much easier to understand than humans. The only reason she leaves the house now is to visit animals she likes at horse therapy, the dog that her counsellor has or the kitten at her art lessons that she has just started. We have two cats at home - one of which Ruby is particularly bonded with and they are together all of the time. Although very much on the cat's terms and she is not able to take the cat out of the house with her.

We believe Ruby’s life would be transformed by an Autism Assistance Dog. Autism Assistance Dogs can interrupt the rising anxiety which leads to meltdowns; provide deep pressure therapy during meltdowns therefore reducing their severity; interrupt self-harming behaviours; vastly improve sleep; remind their handler to take medication; provide sensory feedback and regulation; protect personal space; provide cuddles and companionship - improving self-confidence, easing loneliness and helping their handler to access a social life, access education and face life as an autistic person.

We are raising money to pay for a suitable dog, specialist autism assistance dog training which can be very expensive indeed (provided by someone like https://paws-therapydogs.com), specialist service dog insurance, initial dog equipment and other associated costs.*

We would be so very grateful if you could do any (or all!) of the following, to help us raise this money for Ruby:

- Donate (any amount, big or small would be so appreciated);

- Share our cause with your networks;

- Carry out a sponsored challenge for Ruby;

- Hold an event or coffee morning and donate the proceeds,

- Do your everyday shopping through easyfundraising and appoint 'Ruby's Assistance Dog' as your cause: (https://www.easyfundraising.org.uk/causes/rubys-autism-assistance-dog) - From weekly food shops to new insurance policies, Christmas shopping to booking a holiday, you could help raise money at no extra cost to you! Please bear us in mind, particularly in the run up to Christmas!

We believe that Ruby is an amazing young lady and will make her mark on this world as she grows up. She wants to be a neurodiversity advocate and an actor. We sincerely want to provide her with the opportunity to fulfil her ambitions and potential in life with an assistance dog by her side. We would all be extremely grateful (especially Ruby) for anything you could offer to help us achieve this goal of funding her assistance dog and their specialist training which can be very expensive.

Thank you so much,

Rosie and Ben (and Ruby).

P.s. *Any left over money will be used for service dog insurance or initial every day costs of owning the dog. Thank you.

P.p.s.

Estimated costs for this project:

Dog: (golden retriever puppy): £2500 (approx)


PAWS Assistance Dogs training course: https://paws-assistancedogs.com - £3688 one off cost (or a similar course).

Dog bed: £50

Crate: £70

Toys, dog car seat belt etc: £150

1st year’s Insurance: £672/year (based on £56 a month with “Many Pets” for service dog insurance - who are quite cheap compared to others.)

- Food estimate for 1st year: £600

Watch this to see more about how an autism assistance dog could help Ruby in the same way as this young lady Kiera:

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