30 years ago today, the absolute unimaginable happened. Julian and I said goodbye to my parents on a 'normal' school night as they went out for dinner with friends and went to sleep a family of 4. By 5am the next morning our precious Dad and Husband, Wallace, had died of a huge heart attack at the age of 44. No warning, no goodbyes,  no final hugs, no final words, no normal day at school ahead, no future plans to be the same ever again, just my Mum, my brother who was 12, (just 6 months before his Barmitzvah) and myself, then 14, left in total and utter shock and disbelief. Our pain was immeasurable.

30 years ago, there was no Grief Encounter, no professional service like this for bereaved children and families to turn to. We were surrounded by fabulous family and friends who we could not have got through without. But, we were left, each grieving differently, to navigate all these complex emotions on our own. Understandably, our friends didn't want to talk about what had happened with the fear of upsetting us and we didn't want to upset them or make them feel uncomfortable so 'pretended' to be ok. We wanted to be strong for each other as well, but we were each broken inside trying to cover up our own wound. 

This is the reality of what happens to bereaved families without the right grief support.

It took many years before I 'found the words’, and the right person to truly express my trauma and feelings to; but had Grief Encounter been around then, our individual journeys would have been so very different. Thanks to the incredible work of Dr Shelley Gilbert and Grief Encounter, I see first hand the difference early intervention makes to bereaved children. We know that without the right support, children and young people are more likely to go on to suffer from negative mental health, including social, behavioural and educational issues. 

No one should face grief alone, let alone a child or young person.

We are not sharing our story today for sympathy, we know we are not the only family to have gone on this journey. Every 22 minutes in the UK a child is told their Mummy, Daddy, Brother or Sister has died. We want to mark this poignant day in our lives in a positive way, and by making a difference.

It costs just under £30 to give a bereaved individual a free, confidential helpline support session, providing immediate advice and guidance when someone needs it the most. So if you are able, we would be so grateful if you could help us today by donating £30 (or anything you wish) to raise enough money to provide 30 additional counselling sessions whilst remembering our precious Dad and Husband. Feel free to share your special memories of him on the page as well. We would love to read them.

In loving memory of our dear Dad and Husband, Wallace Goodkind 5th May 1948 - 10th January 1992.

Thanks for taking the time to visit our JustGiving page.

Love Wendy, Vicky & Julian xxxxx

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