Thanks for taking the time to visit my JustGiving page. This is my journey. 

My story from the beginning  (Age 13)

Two people very close to my Mum approached her within the same week saying that my hips were wonky and you could see this in how I walked and advised my mum she should get me seen by the doctors. My mum then phoned the doctors straight away to get me an emergency appointment. 

That following Monday I had an appointment at my local doctors surgery and was told to do a number of stretches/poses to asses what may be wrong. At first the doctors weren't 100% sure what exactly was wrong however they could clearly see my spine wasn't straight. They got my mum to run her hand down my spine and she then knew there was a problem but something she had never noticed before.  Within no time I was then referred to St.Heliers Hospital in Epsom for curvature in my spine. I was then looked after by Mr Dabis who was a orthopaedic surgeon who advised me of what would happen next.

Spine currently at 37 degrees 

The Back Brace (Age 14)

So I started with the non surgery route as to be honest it absolutely petrified me and I thought If I have the option to avoid it, I will. I had to be measured for the brace, once these measurements were taken they were then sent off to America for the brace to be made which took roughly four weeks. When it arrived back in the UK I had to go back to the hospital for it to then be cut into my physical body shape. The back brace was an off white colour, had a hard plastic coating with three fabric straps at the back, like a corset to pull you in super tight. This is definitely  one of my saddest memories of my journey to this day. I had to wear the brace for 23 hours a day and was only allowed to take it off to wash and do sports at school. Wearing the brace at school was hard as I was the only student with Scoliosis and you can imagine people weren't at all that nice. It was so uncomfortable at first, especially at night, I used to cry my eyes out in pain, struggling to breathe and not being able to sleep and just not feeling comfortable which is all completely normal but just not the normal for me. This was also very hard for my Mum, she had to pull my straps tight and help me into the brace as I wasn't able to do this by myself. I couldn't get myself in and out the brace properly without help. Mum brought me seamless vests to try and help for under my brace as it used to rub all the time and make my skin very sensitive, but I knew in the long run as long as I kept wearing it, it would make things better. I had regular check ups and was just told to keep wearing the brace until they thought it was safe to be able to stop wearing it. 

I was then reviewed a few years later to see if my spine had stayed the same and not curved anymore , I believe I had just turned 17 at this point. I was told that I no longer needed to wear the brace as my spine had fused together and I wont grow anymore for the spine to move. I had a x-ray which had proven to bring my spine from 37 degress to 23 degress.  I couldn't believe it, all that time and heartache with the brace kind of became a part of me for the better. Mum was over the moon as all that time I stuck to wearing the brace had really paid off and made a difference. So if you’re reading this and your currently wearing a brace, please please wear it as much as you can. 

Discharged Too Early ( Age 20 )

Unfortunately for me, a few years on I started suffering with really bad knots in my shoulders, at first I thought maybe it was just stress from work/general life things however Mum pushed me to get checked by the doctors considering the journey I had already been on with my spine. They instantly referred me straight to physio, which I did a few weeks in my local town before they then referred me straight back to the hospital. I felt like it was happening all over again and I was re-living my 13yr old self. 

I was then referred to the William Harvey Hospital in Ashford and I was assigned as a patient to Mr Johnathan Lucas. I attended the appointment alone as my Mum was away and we just really hoped for the best and didn't think anything major was going to happen. At the appointment he clarified that my spine had moved however he wanted to give it a years time to see if there were any minor/major differences. This was hard to hear, especially being told that my spine had moved and now I also need to see what this next year holds. I also felt slight relief as I knew within that year I wouldn't be having an operation. 

Over that year I didn't suffer with any other problems other than the knots so I was praying that all would be ok and an operation wouldn't be needed. I had never had an operation before but the thought of having such major surgery frightened me. 

One year on ( Age 22 ) 

After that year had passed, I had many x-rays, MRI's and examinations to be told by Mr Lucas that my spine had gone over the 45 degree mark which is an definite operation. Of course you have the choice however the fact my spine had moved such a great deal the probability of having a walking stick or ending up in wheel chair by the age of 40 were high. This all came as a horrible shock to me and my Mum as all the previous hard work with the brace, that I had been told I was going to be ok and my spine had fused together. Even though you have the choice to have an operation I felt like I didn't. I was just so scared of all the possibilities and the problems I now could face. At such a young age to have such a scary operation I almost started to feel angry at myself that I didn't just have it done at age 14. Part of me didn't want the operation because I should have never of been let go by the previous hospital and I was scared something would go wrong but after being talked round for the best I booked in the operation.

There was a waiting list for the op, I believe around 6 months, so I my mind this was my last 6 months of freedom before everything would come crashing down. I wasn't negative about having the operation just  more purely petrified and thinking the worst. I have really bad anxiety which for those who understand what anxiety is like, it sent mine through the roof. In the back of my mind I knew this operation was for the better I just didn't want to believe it was actually happening. 

Date confirmed - Tuesday 8th May 2018 Guys Hospital London

After the sleepless nights, pre-op assessments the day had arrived. Me and Mum stayed over the night before in the hospital, not that we slept. I was the first patient for the morning. My surgeon, Mr Lucas came up to the ward to get me and wheeled me down to what I call the fridge. Correct term would be pre-op area. Because I had never been put to sleep before, I didn't really know what to expect but I just remember it being so light, bright white walls and lots of doctors and nurses in this small room. I was lucky enough to have my Mum in there with me, I think because I wouldn't stop crying Mums are the best to have by your side. After all my worry, honestly in the fridge their was nothing to worry about, all the doctors and nurses were so friendly just chatting away to me, I didn't even feel the needle go in my arm. As my body was clearly having none of it, the dosage they had given me only made me super super drowsy as I was trying to subconsciously fight off the drugs, so in the end they had to gas mask me to get me to sleep. I was then in surgery for roughly around 4 hours. 

After Surgery/ Post Surgery 

When I woke up all I remember feeling was just tired and nothing else. I was on so many drugs I didn't feel any pain. After being wheeled back to the ward, Mum was waiting for me but I cant really remember the rest of that day, it was such a blur. The next morning Mr Lucas came round and got me out of bed, I managed to take two steps and that was enough. The pain was excruciating, I think some of the hard drugs had worn off,  I had massive padded sticky pads covering my spine as I could only lay on my back. I had a morphine button which I clicked every 5 minutes, so that relieved the pain a little. I wasn't able to do anything by myself, I had to be bed bathed, if I needed the toilet a nurse had to help me get out of bed which could take me 10 minutes just to even sit up. I couldn't lift anything either really other than my water bottle. I knew things were going to be tough but I guess you forget that you use you back for everything and any slight movement caused different pains. I was lucky to have my own room in the hospital and was looked after day and night by all of the lovely staff at Guys Hospital. Nobody was allowed to stay over with me so once visiting hours were over, I felt like I was on my own. I didn't really sleep and when I couldn't I always used to call my Grandad and he would just try and calm me down and put me at ease. I was in hospital for a total of five days, I was so determined to get out, like most people I'm really not a fan of hospitals. Mr Lucas checked on me every day ( 7am to be precise ) and got me out of bed each time as he wanted to monitor my progress. I will always remember a nurse coming round in the morning to inject my tummy which felt horrible. I guess the horrible parts always stay with you.  I had physiotherapists that would also come and visit me once or twice a day which I loved, they were amazing and just made the days go quicker. They would monitor me walking ( very very slowly ) to the toilet and back, which to do that walk now would take me about 5 seconds but at the time felt like a lifetime. They also helped me practice walking up and down steps again. Before they were happy with me leaving I had to be able to walk to the toilet and back by myself and to the end of the ward and back. Nothing was stopping me from achieving this. 

Once the 5 days were up and Mr Lucas was happy, I was then discharged from hospital and was allowed to go home. I was prescribed a number of medications which Mum kept a diary of as there was so much. I believe I took around 22 tablets per day.

Mum took three months off work as she cared for me 24 hours a day. So big shout out to you mum, literally my lifesaver. 

And then it was onto the long road of recovery ( and still recovering )  but I am forever grateful for Mr Lucas and the whole team at Guys Hospital who couldn't have looked after me any better. I am so glad I had the operation and hopefully am able to inspire others to not be afraid. It really has made me who I am today.

Surgery -  Adolescent idiopathic scoliosis spinal surgery T10 - L3 Titanium rods/screws - I have attached my X-rays in the comments.