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Our story

This month I am going to try to raise as much money as possible for Ella's Memory. More specifically The Daisy Suite at RCHT.

This month is Baby loss and Awareness with their many week starting tomorrow finishing with a wave of light Saturday night.

Baby loss is something that unfortunately has effected many close people in my life. It is so important to keep fighting to break the silence so people feel supported and loved in their darkest hours, instead of isolated and alone.

Our story

April 15th 2016 will forever be a date etched in my memory. Tim an I were expecting our second baby and it was the date of our 20 week scan. Due to delays and other factors we were actually 22 and half weeks pregnant by the time we had this scan.

We walked into the scan room at 4.15pm on a Friday afternoon at Barncoose hospital full of excitement we had decided to find out the sex and had an unveiling party planned with our family that night.  We were met by a trainee Dr and the sonographer, we agreed the trainee could do our scan. To begin with I thought that's why it was taking so long, the sonographer then took after and that is when my world stood still. I remember words such as problem with the baby, fluid on the brain, organs outside the body, heart only 2 chambers... the rest is a blur. It was Friday and the sonographer informed us most of the staff at Treliske had left for the day. She was amazing and rung department after department until she finally got us an appointment at the hospital first thing Monday.

What followed was a weekend of unknown, constant googling, crying, hope, heartache and waiting......I remember having to try to function for Billy who was only 1 at the time. Walking around Porthleven food festival feeling like I was frozen in time.

Monday soon arrived and this is where the amazing team and Treliske hospital started doing their thing. More scans and sympathetic faces. The fantastic consultant was so caring and supportive and informed us of everything. He diagnosed a condition called Edwards Syndrome and the extent our little man had it was not compatible with life. We could continue the pregnancy but he would not live, and would probably not survive the rest of the term. Then came the issue of time, we were now 23 weeks, at 24 weeks the law changes and we would have to have a a death certificate and a funeral. The baby might also be been alive. Following support and guidance we decided to terminate the pregnancy, even writing that still makes me feel sick but it was the right decision. We watched on a monitor as iodine was injected into out babys heart to stop it. We were then booked into the daisy suite for the Thursday to be induced and deliver the baby.

This suite is an amazing resource and something all hospitals should have, but sadly do not. It is an independent room for you to stay in during your labour and as much time as you need after. It is beautifully decorated and manned by incredible nurses. It meant that I did not have to be in delivery suite listening to all the other babies crying whilst mine did not, it meant Tim and I and our family members could come to terms with what was happening in comfort and with support. I will be eternally grateful for this resource my whole life.

However, at the time of our ordeal there was only one room and if it was in use it meant that other mums would not have access to it. It needs funds and up keep and this is not being done by Ella's Memory.

So that is why I have decided to try to raise some money this month to help support the Daisy Suite ❤ 👶