In loving memory of Tracy Williams, my beautiful mummy. 

I am doing a sponsored skydive to raise as much money as possible for Mind mental health and I need your help in order to do so.

Mental health is just as important as physical health. So please help to save lives.

My mother passed away on 24th of January 2020, by taking her own life. Sadly, her elder brother did the same on 24th May 2019. She had intended on skydiving the summer of 2020, to raise money for Mind, the mental health charity; a cause close to her heart. This is a chosen charity by myself as it's also a charity close to my heart; I suffer with mental health issues and so do other family members. 

I am the youngest of three girls; but not so young anymore. After her passing, 24 days later I turned 22. Until the day that mum died, I lived with her; under her wings. My whole world has been turned upside down; my whole life has changed. It was just mum and I at home; fending for ourselves and for each other. My two elder sisters left home years ago, starting their own little families. I know what it's like to know someone who has died, but not have such an impact that it affects your own life. When hearing that someone has died, you're like "wow, how sad"; but to what extent does it stay in your mind? To the world my mum might be one person, but to me my mum is the world. Oh goodness I'm suffering so much inside; with barely any emotion on the outside. The grieving process has only just begun, with the rest of my days living to follow.

I have no idea why I have signed myself up to skydive, scared, nervous and anxious; but knowing I'm doing this for my mum, uncle and for those still suffering today. I would never have dreamed of jumping out of a plane if it wasn't for my mother passing.

My skydive details are as follow:

• It will be a tandem skydive
  
• It will be at Old Sarum Park, Old Sarum, Salisbury, SP4 6EB
• I will be approx. 15,000ft high
• I will be approx. free falling for 45sec at 125mph
• My choice of date is to be rearranged (hopefully this summer)

I would like to share my words with the world, the very same words I read aloud at my mother's funeral.

God saw you getting tired

God saw you getting tired,

when a cure was not to be.

So he wrapped his arms around you,

and whispered, "come with me".

You didn't deserve what you went through,

and so he gave you rest.

God's garden must be beautiful,

he only takes the best.

So when I saw you sleeping,

so peaceful and free from pain.

I could not wish you to come back,

to suffer that all again.

My beautiful mummy

Mum had only started to grieve for her elder late brother, with pain and life too much to cope. Now I hope she will attain, that they have found each once other again.

So angry and hurt, with continuous questions that can now never be answered. But coming from an insider, I can understand why. Believing that she was no good to anyone; I'd always reply, you don't have to do or say anything, just by you being here in this world is enough.

She is beautiful inside and out, with a very caring heart. Genuine and honest shining through, more than anyone I know. She is the funniest and most hilarious human ever, always trying to make situations better. Saying, something good always has to come out of something bad. Now some of you may relate this to someone else you see; but this is my mummy, the best person someone can be.

There is absolutely no one else on this planet I'd rather refer to as 'mum'. Your gorgeous existence, the greatest gift from God. I love you the same today as I did yesterday, forever and always. Learning what love is, from all your kind hearted and gentle ways. I am proud to call you my mummy, despite what others may say. You are my creator, as I turn to you for guidance; I would not be the person that I am today.

Her best interests have always been for me to succeed. To succeed at everything life has to throw at me, but never preparing for me to grieve. I walk in her footsteps, brave, strong and proud. My one and true love only, my love at first sight.

The powerful bond between mother and daughter, is like no other. The instant connection of friendship as I first lay my eyes upon her. My only true friend, my best friend for life. Tracy is my mummy and always will be; I am her baby and always will be.

The last time I saw mum was the day that she died, with the usual two kisses, followed by our special goodnight. That night of her passing I felt her say goodbye, holding my hand as I felt it rise. For the last time in her presence, I share this moment with you guys; night mum, love you lots, night.

My mum never got the help offered after her brother passed, all other help offered was never enough for her throughout her fifty years of life. I know it all has to come from yourself and the only person that can change things, is yourself. No therapy, councillor or mental health service has helped me with what is constantly in my mind; the only person who is trying to make a difference in my life, is me. 

I know that I can do this, I know that I am strong and I know whoever needs to hear this, you can continue to live day by day too. I'm not saying by excepting or by not excepting help, it could make a difference to your life. 

But by donating to Mind, it could make a difference to someone else's life. Making all that time I thought I had wasted and knowing I will never get it back; making me realise, actually, my life is on track. Meaning mine, yours and other lives do count, we are not just a number; but sometimes without acknowledging, we have a meaningful life.

I know at this current time, worldwide, is going to be difficult for people being able to support their own families. I am so close to getting my minimum goal. I have until Saturday 8th May 2021 (one week prior to my jump) to raise as much as possible. So please continue to share and donate, every penny counts.

This is not only to the memory of my late mother and uncle, but to those who still continue to suffer daily.

Your donation could give someone hope and help them know they're not alone.

Any amount of money donated will be very much appreciated.

I cannot thank you enough to those who have donated, this really does mean a lot to me. With the support from friends, family and even strangers, this really wouldn't be possible.

I have made a YouTube video, so please feel free to watch. I will update once I have done my skydive. The link is below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCB-DZmu4LU

Thank you for taking the time to visit my JustGiving page.

Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving - they'll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they'll send your money directly to the charity. So it's the most efficient way to donate - saving time and cutting costs for the charity.