When the tides are right, at some stage between Aug 15^th-18^th, maybe setting off in the middle of the night, I am going to be swimming in a Five person team Relay Team across the English Channel and a few weeks later on Sep 5^th, I am going to walk 10kms and swim 15kms in various legs around the Scilly Isles. 

I’ve decided to try and raise some money for Child Bereavement UK. As most of you will know, I had kidney cancer five years ago and this October, I will, I very much hope receive my final “Five Year All Clear. “ 

I’ve chosen Child Bereavement UK in memory of dear friends, especially Louisa and John, who did not get to their “five year all clear" and indeed for  Douglas, not taken by cancer but taken far too early.  The Charity pretty much does what it says on the tin, providing support for young children who lose parents and parents who lose children. And I have seen close up what a difference it can make. You can find out more about what the Charity does here http://www.childbereavementuk.org 

It was very important for some of the people I love most in the world and I know the work it does helps many people in times of immense pain, loss and grief. 

The Hitchhiker fans amongst you will recognise the signficance of the amount.

For my part, I had a hard time for the first two years after my operation, when they took my left kidney out.  I think, looking back that I was probably coping with depression some of the time and physically the recovery was not simple. The first time I had a lunch up in town about seven weeks after my operation, I was so tired when I came home that I crawled up the stairs to bed on my hands and knees, so training for the Channel and Scilly Isle Swims feels good and I know how lucky I am. Just yesterday I was training down in Dover Harbour, the sun was glinting on the waves and the tide was running strongly against us and the waves were choppy and I had to find another gear to keep making progress.  It felt good to feel strong like that and the sheer joy of swimming was  sublimely exhilarating. 

And in the past five years, when I encountered a deep and unexpected sense of vulnerability in myself, I have come to celebrate, even more, the love of my family and friends, the power of empathy and compassion, the importance of imagining what others may be thinking or feeling, and of taking responsibility for the impact you have on other people, the power of simply being present when people are in trouble and of making the space for them to talk if they want to and not forcing it if they don’t, the importance of creativity, nuance, uncertainty, of mystery, of “not knowing”, of hiking the wild places of the world and swimming!!