So today the lovely Alex Flynn asked me if I'd be willing to be waxed for charity on the 15th of November. Immediately I said, 'yes!', and then immediately after that I said, 'oops'.

Because I am a very hairy man. I don't know how many of you reading this have seen the full extent of it, and most of you who have had probably just about suppressed the memory so sorry for triggering any flashbacks, but I have a second layer of all-natural clothing to keep me warm during the winter. I like to think of myself as having a nicely masculine crop of soft, inviting foliage, but the reaction I usually get is just 'Eeeshk. You're really hairy aren't you? Is it like that all ove- oh, it is? Oh. Okay', so I may be living in a dreamland.

Sometime between 12:00 and 14:00 in the University Forum on Friday 15th, the kind and helpful (spiteful and sadistic) people from the Richard Beaumont salon will be generously giving up their spare time (gleefully leaping at the opportunity) to grant me the smooth, sexy skin I've always desired (rip my body to pink, bald shreds). 

There will be screaming, there will be pain, there will be before and after pictures, and at the end there will just be a tiny, cold, hairless baby.

I certainly would not be doing this if it wasn't for charity, so PLEASE, please, donate anything you can - the button is up there on the right. It will make me feel (marginally) better about the whole thing.